A Place to Belong

Sam Friesen never imagined the path her life would take — but through faith, community, and a willingness to step in, she discovered how much beauty can come from saying yes when it matters most.

As the mother of a daughter with autism, Sam has always carried a deep passion for encouraging and uplifting families who find themselves navigating the unexpected. This led her to a thriving career with Joni & Friends, an incredible organization that has been serving individuals and families with disabilities for over 40 years through organized programs and retreats that  provide support and inspire hope. Sam  was first introduced to Joni & Friends by a friend who invited her to one of their Disability Resource Fairs and by the end of the day, she knew she wanted to be part of their mission.  She began by volunteering, and two years later, Sam is now a key part of the team, helping plan retreats, community events, and inclusive experiences for families of all abilities. “I started as a volunteer,” she said, “and ended up right where I was meant to be.”

Her commitment to supporting families didn’t stop at work; it extended into her own family’s life. Around the same time Sam was settling into her role at Joni & Friends, her family dynamic had started to shift in a major way. Growing up, Sam’s niece Lily was a constant presence in her life and over the course of several years, Sam witnessed Lily’s living situation with her biological mother become increasingly unstable. As she entered her early teens, Lily’s mother gave up her parental rights and Sam’s mother (Lily’s grandmother) stepped in to care for her. Tragically, a mere few months after Lily moved in, Sam’s mother passed away and left a deep hole in their family. 

Faced with this reality, Sam felt a quiet but powerful pull to step in. Her niece was left in a home with a step-grandfather struggling with grief and an uncle dealing with mental health challenges, and Sam knew her own family could provide the stability she needed.

“I prayed for months,” she said. “I was grieving, and wanted to make sure our family could handle the new dynamic. But I realized I was just being stubborn. She needed to come home with me.”

Sam clearly remembers the conversation that changed both of their lives. After making the decision with her husband to open up their home, they sat down together and made a very important phone call. “Uncle Frank and I have something to ask you,” “We need you to think about it carefully before you answer. Would you like to come live with us?”

Without hesitation, Lily said, “Yes.” Sam reiterated the importance of her niece carefully considering the decision and after a pause that Sam could tell was only for her benefit, her niece said “yes” again. 

That same week, they packed her things and brought her home. She was 17 at the time — scared, yet hopeful. Two years later, she’s thriving, attending a local community college and building a future surrounded by love and stability. “Lily has fit in like a glove,” Sam shared. “Sometimes I’m Auntie, sometimes I’m Mom. The dynamic is unique but it works because we all want it to.”

The journey hasn’t been easy. Navigating guardianship, endless paperwork, and mental health care has been full of obstacles, but Sam’s faith and perseverance have guided her through. During the times she felt broken, Sam admits “I had to decide which pieces of myself to pick up,” while “the rest, I laid to rest with my mom.” 

Throughout this process, Sam has found community in places like The Alliance, connecting with others who understand the challenges of caring for children who have experienced trauma. She’s also leaned on her Joni & Friends family — attending family retreats where  her family feels completely accepted and understood. “It was the first time we felt like a real family,” she said. “Pure acceptance. Everyone just gets it.”

Now, Sam continues to pour that same love and understanding into her work, planning events that help other families experience belonging and hope. 

Through her resilience, Sam reminds us that there is so much beauty in the unexpected. She encourages anyone else currently wrestling with uncertainty that we don’t need to have all the answers before stepping in to provide care and love for those who need it most.